Constructive activities like playing tennis, or learning to play the piano are activites that we can proudly relate to others. Destructive activities like doing cocaine, or shop-lifting are activities we try to hide from others.
Pursuing constructive activities are important. This is because our activities and lifestyle are interdependent with the lifestyles of others. We pursue constructive activities not only because they bring us pleasure, but because they help us build relationships, cliques and communities.
The so-called "pick-up community" is trying to develop the activity of improving social interactions with women. The community is in its pioneer stages. We must heed the importance of being able to communicate the activity of improving social interactions with women as a respectable activity. If we fail to engage in respectable activities, we can frustrate the confidence we need to go out and form relationships. If we frustrate our ability to form relationships, then ultimately our efforts to improve our success with women will be in irony and vanity.
The so-called "pick-up community" is trying to develop the activity of improving social interactions with women. The community is in its pioneer stages. We must heed the importance of being able to communicate the activity of improving social interactions with women as a respectable activity. If we fail to engage in respectable activities, we can frustrate the confidence we need to go out and form relationships. If we frustrate our ability to form relationships, then ultimately our efforts to improve our success with women will be in irony and vanity.
Above all else, the activity of interacting with women must be established as a constructive activity. Any activity or skill-learning we engage in must make us feel better the more we do it. That constructive activity must add value to our lives. That constructive activity must help us increase our self-esteem. That constructive activity must allow us to become better at the activity the more we practice it. Finally, the better we become at an activity, the more we should notice an improvement in our lives in general – in other areas that stretch beyond that certain activity.
To illustrate the importance of engaging in constructive acitivities, we can examine the consequences of engaging in destructive activities- activities such as drinking, over-eating, or fighting, as examples.
Any destructive activity has undesirable consequences. The first and most tragic consequence of a destructive activity is that it compromises our overal well-being. This ensures the long-term inability to engage in a wide gamut of constructive activities that depend on our well-being to perform them. Aside from the self-destruction of destructive activities, non-constructive activities do not contribute to our self-esteem… they do not cross-over to improve other areas of our lives… and we generally do not grow in their midst over the long-term.
Take fraternity beer boat racing, for example. Boat races are a riot. Undergrads train to down pints of beer as fast as possible. The faster and faster an undergrad drinks, the better they are at the boat-racing game. Drinking is healthy enough in the short-term, but long-term systematic overdrinking can become a problem. So the best of the best boat racers become the losers of the game, if their drinking becomes problematic. Overdrinking can drain their financial resources and compromise their health. For problem drinkers, becoming healthy can involve completely abstaining from alcohol altogether, while modest drinkers will continue to enjoy the occasional drink.
To illustrate the importance of engaging in constructive acitivities, we can examine the consequences of engaging in destructive activities- activities such as drinking, over-eating, or fighting, as examples.
Any destructive activity has undesirable consequences. The first and most tragic consequence of a destructive activity is that it compromises our overal well-being. This ensures the long-term inability to engage in a wide gamut of constructive activities that depend on our well-being to perform them. Aside from the self-destruction of destructive activities, non-constructive activities do not contribute to our self-esteem… they do not cross-over to improve other areas of our lives… and we generally do not grow in their midst over the long-term.
Take fraternity beer boat racing, for example. Boat races are a riot. Undergrads train to down pints of beer as fast as possible. The faster and faster an undergrad drinks, the better they are at the boat-racing game. Drinking is healthy enough in the short-term, but long-term systematic overdrinking can become a problem. So the best of the best boat racers become the losers of the game, if their drinking becomes problematic. Overdrinking can drain their financial resources and compromise their health. For problem drinkers, becoming healthy can involve completely abstaining from alcohol altogether, while modest drinkers will continue to enjoy the occasional drink.
The point of this article is to challenge you right now to reflect on the activity and so-called skill of meeting and dating women and concentrate on defining what type of activity it really is.
If we are talking about improving in comedic techniques, pursuing careers in marketing, or promoting, then “sarging” or meeting and dating women could be communicated as side-effects of the real passions for comedy and business-building. Comedy and business-building are two very respectable activities that can and should be well-communicated to others.
Expertise in kino-escalation (which means physically arousing women), can be the side-effect of a passion for latin-dancing- a sport focussed on improving dance moves with a female counterpart. Latin dancing is a constructive activity. Kino-escalation is not a constructive activity, because learning to grope women must be kept a secret from mainstream society and from women. Similarly, strict self-improvement, and spiritual growth, can be the vehicle for proficiency in maintaining long-term relationships. Spiritual growth can be well-argued to be a constructive undertaking, while learning how to get a girlfriend in step-by-step methods unfortunately cannot.
Aspiring to be porn-stars, or developing classes for the con-arts, in the name of "the art" or "discipline" of picking up women cannot be communicated as respectable lifestyles if not for any other reason, then that they are self-destructive activities. They are activites that will destroy any chances we have to successfully meet and build relationships with women in the long-term.
To become super at meeting and dating women, could mean distracting ourselves from focussing on our overall, rounded life success - which is the key to success with women. To become somehow “super” at meeting and dating women is then a vain undertaking, and a lot of "date-coaches" will have to wrestle with this.
Once this acitivity of improving success with women is clearly defined as a constructive activity, then we can go on to lay the ground-work for establishing improvement with women as a therapy, or self-development process that has its place in mainstream society.
I know I used to feel that way before I got the dating area of my life handled. When I was single, I would see a woman I was attracted to, clam up, become nervous and miss a great opportunity to meet someone new. But after failing hundreds and hundreds of times to successfully meet new women, I started to gain some insight into the whole process of social interaction. 
